Skipping, Not Always a Good Idea

Over the years I have had a number of sober accidents. A few of you may know about some of them. There was the “Fan Wax” incident of ’02, “Oops the Sidewalk Ended” of ’03, and “Heel in Cuff” of ’05 just to name a few. Well, I have had my first sober, painful accident of ’06 and it involved skipping. Apparently one should not skip ever if one is clumsy (Pam – Do you remember your skipping incident “No zapatos para me?”) Anyway, I was happily watching television on the couch in my living room and had just finished eating a delicious Weight Watchers fudge bar (I like to eat mine in a bowl with a spoon. It’s more fun that way. These fudge bars are quite good. You should go out and get some for yourself). The fudge bar was so delicious and I decided I needed a second. I was in such a great mood that I leapt right off the couch with my bowl and spoon in hand and began to skip to the kitchen. Unfortunately this did not last long. I was barefooted skipping from my couch to the kitchen and my Ethernet cable was draped across the floor where it lays on a daily basis. Somehow the cable inserted itself between two of my toes and next few moments were a blur. I remember thinking “Oh NO! I’m going to trip” and then in slow motion my body rose high up into the air, my left hand let go of the bowl and sent the spoon and bowl flying meanwhile gravity kicked in and my body landed or should I say “pounded the ground” right knee and right forearm first into the carpet, which I have to say was quite rough. It is also unfortunate that I was wearing jeans because the denim gave me a burn. My right knee is now a large bluish colored bump with scaly skin. My right arm received a small carpet burn and my carpet received a chocolate stain from the flying spoon. I did eventually make it to the kitchen albeit hobbling and whimpering the whole way. Amazingly the bowl was unharmed. I was determined to eat that second fudge bar, which I did and I enjoyed even though my knee was throbbing. I think I’ll go put some ice on it now.