Don't Spill the Coffee

Well, my graceful self struck again. This is not that funny, but typical, so I'm sharing. Here's what happened. I returned home from some afternoon errand running today. I got out of my car, which I had parked in my apartment parking garage and took my Starbucks iced latte with me. I walked up to the door that allows me entry into the hallway leading to my apartment. Just as I was walking through the door, one of my neighbors was leaving. Unfortunately for me, he didn't leave fast enough. I walked around my neighbor slowly and then slipped on the polished concrete floor (it is raining today) and went down fast. This time rather than falling forward as I normally do, I fell backwards onto my hip, so that I landed with my body sprawled on the floor. Luckily the contents of my purse did not empty themselves, I didn't spill my coffee, and my back was to the neighbor. There was an awkward moment of silence as I sat on the floor (car payment plus shiny blue snakeskin boots unharmed - thank g-d [must credit Carla for term used to describe the boots]) . I'm guessing that the neighbor was trying to surpress laughter as I could not see him because my back was to him. Then he broke the silence with "Are you okay?" to which I responded with "It would make me feel better if you laughed, but I'm okay". I got up quickly and scampered away not wanting to face the neighbor.

Flat Tire

I just saw Match Point with some friends at The Angelika. It was a very good movie, but also disturbing. After the movie I was excited to get to my car because it was cold and misting outside and I wanted to get home to prepare for an interview I have tomorrow morning. I got to my car, which was parked in a spot close to theater. I was a bit concerned about the spot as it was a tight one and I thought one of my doors would get dinged. When I returned to my car the doors appeared to be just as they were when I left them (yippy!). I got in my car and started to move towards the parking lot exit. I decided to check my messages on my cell phone as I was driving out. My sweet little mother called to ask how I was doing. I called my parent’s house to return their call just as I was turning left from Mockingbird to go south on Central. My parents weren’t home so I left a message saying that I just saw Match Point. I believe it was right as the name of the movie was coming out of my mouth (I was on Central by this time.) that I felt a familiar feeling (unfortunately for me it’s a very familiar feeling) that feeling was one of a car with a flat tire. Therefore, my parent’s have a message waiting for them when they get home that says “Hi parents. It’s your daughter. I just saw Match Point. Oh, no! I believe I have a flat tire and I’m on 75 (AKA Central). Don’t worry, I’m exiting and should safely make it off the highway.”. I’m sure they will be pleased when they hear it. I did make it off 75 safely and pulled into a gas station. I, then, decided to call my friend Carrie, who I was just at the movie with, to let her know what happened because I thought my situation was funny. Carrie offered for her and her friend Brendan, who is visiting just for today from Arkansas and is flying home tomorrow, to come to my rescue. Carrie patiently waited while the gallant Brendan changed my tire. What nice people those two are. Thanks Carrie and Brendan. This concludes another episode of a day in my life. I am not going to eat a Weight Watchers fudge bar tonight. The way my luck is going I couldn’t take the chance. Oh, by the way, this flat tire was about my 8th flat tire in five years.

Cups Falleth on the Floor

I went shopping at Central Market today and they had chips and salsa for sampling. I, of course, had to have some. I accidentally knocked a column of cups to put the salsa in on to the floor as I was trying to get salsa into my cup. They went everywhere. I had to pick them all up as others were coming to get samples (the table was unattended). People just looked at me with funny expressions on their face while I was crouched on the floor picking up my mess. I tried to make friendly funny comments to them, but I ended up talking to myself.

Sequined Birds, Good Luck

I was at Nordstrom NorthPark yesterday getting a massage (I was the very lucky recipient of Nordstrom’s spa gift card for Christmas.). For those of you that know me well, which I believe most of you do, I could not resist the urge to shop after my massage was over and I was released into the store. I have been so good. I haven’t bought any clothes since the beginning of November. However, before I could make it down to the shoe department (I didn’t buy any shoes!!!!!! Can you believe it????) I was held captive on the second floor. The lights were bright and the clothes were sparkling (lots of sequins), I just could not leave without looking, which leads me to my story. I purchased this really cute white cotton ¾ length sleeved, v-neck T-shirt with beautiful beaded and sequined birds, flowers, and a horse shoe in hues of pinks, blues, purples, and greens and the words “Good Luck” on it. Everyone knows that I could use as much good luck as possible right now, so I had to buy the shirt (No comments please, I am trying to lift my spirits. Leave me alone ;-)). I am not sure if all of you know this, but I don’t try on my clothes before I buy them (this works our very well about 99.5% of the time). Anyway, I decided that I would wear the shirt today. I bought it in a medium because it looked a little small and when I put it fit nicely. Except that it makes me look, how shall I put this, like a “very nice girl”. The kind of girl that gives very freely of herself. The v-neck is more of a plunging neckline and it’s hard to read the words “Good Luck”. I am afraid of the jokes that could be made by people who actually are able to read the words on the shirt. Alas, I will have to see if I can wear the shirt with a tank top underneath otherwise I will walk around feeling self conscious with people whispering comments under their breath like, “Yeah, Good Luck keeping those in your shirt” and “look…how cute… those birds are flying right into the valley of cleavage.”.

Skipping, Not Always a Good Idea

Over the years I have had a number of sober accidents. A few of you may know about some of them. There was the “Fan Wax” incident of ’02, “Oops the Sidewalk Ended” of ’03, and “Heel in Cuff” of ’05 just to name a few. Well, I have had my first sober, painful accident of ’06 and it involved skipping. Apparently one should not skip ever if one is clumsy (Pam – Do you remember your skipping incident “No zapatos para me?”) Anyway, I was happily watching television on the couch in my living room and had just finished eating a delicious Weight Watchers fudge bar (I like to eat mine in a bowl with a spoon. It’s more fun that way. These fudge bars are quite good. You should go out and get some for yourself). The fudge bar was so delicious and I decided I needed a second. I was in such a great mood that I leapt right off the couch with my bowl and spoon in hand and began to skip to the kitchen. Unfortunately this did not last long. I was barefooted skipping from my couch to the kitchen and my Ethernet cable was draped across the floor where it lays on a daily basis. Somehow the cable inserted itself between two of my toes and next few moments were a blur. I remember thinking “Oh NO! I’m going to trip” and then in slow motion my body rose high up into the air, my left hand let go of the bowl and sent the spoon and bowl flying meanwhile gravity kicked in and my body landed or should I say “pounded the ground” right knee and right forearm first into the carpet, which I have to say was quite rough. It is also unfortunate that I was wearing jeans because the denim gave me a burn. My right knee is now a large bluish colored bump with scaly skin. My right arm received a small carpet burn and my carpet received a chocolate stain from the flying spoon. I did eventually make it to the kitchen albeit hobbling and whimpering the whole way. Amazingly the bowl was unharmed. I was determined to eat that second fudge bar, which I did and I enjoyed even though my knee was throbbing. I think I’ll go put some ice on it now.